A few months ago, I was stressing myself out. I needed to complete the first 50 pages of my novel for a fellowship opportunity. I bought a printer to make sure I hit the goal and do some edits. I wrote over 9,000 words in a matter of days. I was so close. However, after printing it out, I noticed I was about 9 pages short. That was too much to write in the time frame I had and write a statement of purpose. I questioned whether I was talking myself out of it or this opportunity was not meant for me.
I decide to check who the judges are for the contest. I don’t know why I didn’t check sooner. I quickly realize, these are not my people. Well, they could be but not for my novel. We’re talking writers who have written for The New Yorker and published literary works. I want to write a literary novel but I’m not starting there. Seeing who the judges were and knowing the genre of my novel (amateur sleuth/mystery genre), it made sense to me that this might not be the right writing opportunity. Of course, being me, I needed a sign.
I consult the IChing and it didn’t answer my question. I was on the verge of sucking it up and doing it but I happened upon A Note From the Universe:
Confusion, indecision, and uncertainty often mean that if you wait a little longer before deciding, an even better option will emerge, with such clarity it may bite you on the nose and sweep you off your feet.
The nice kind of bite.
I'd say wait a little longer,
The Universe
P.S. Of course, even as you wait, you'll keep moving, grooving, and living your amazing life.
The Universe provides! It was as if there was direct line from my brain to the Universe. I relaxed. I decided I should wait for a better suited opportunity. A month later, a better one did arrive.
It’s hard to trust your doubt and apprehension when you can’t discern whether your feelings are valid or you’re self-sabotaging. Just know you are not alone. Sometimes, it does take stepping back and waiting to find the right path. Remember, what is for you is always going to be for you. It may take longer than expected but you will get there, one step at a time. Trust in yourself and the Universe will provide every time.
Until next time,
Xoxo~Christilisa